Saturday, July 7, 2018

FTDF Stage 1 - Gaviria Guns It

Hello there, I'll have to make this quick, as I spent way more time than I will care to admit calculating scores for y'all. Stage 1 certainly started off predictable enough. A trio of French riders were allowed to get some TV time before the Sprinter's teams decided enough was enough and brought things back together for the last 20 km or so. Less predictable were all the big names who lost a minute or more due to a crash packed finale. Most notable was Chris Froome with this little maneuver.



But also losing time were Porte, Yates and Nairo Quintana. The Columbian was left all alone after a mechanical as his Movistar team were up the road looking after their other two team leaders. When everyone is a team leader, no one is.



The sprint for the stage win went the way of Fernando Gaviria, who held Sagan and Kittel at bay and will start off in the Yellow Jersey tomorrow.



So here's the scores that I made up, you should be able to check my calculations on the Google Sheet at the top of the links list. I can add more Teams as I find out about them.

RankFantasy TeamSt 1
1History Boys500
2Running with the Bulls and an Inhaler450
3Chanbots Ultra370
4Bile Beans271
5Dudes Riding Using Good Stuff262
6The Golden Lions eating a baguette219
7The Charmers184
8Kloefekappers FC138
9Do Androids Dream of Chris Froome68
10Smugblokes68

Stage 2 should, by all accounts, be another sprint, but the finish won't be quite as flat as today.

Friday, July 6, 2018

Velogames Cease and Desist

As some of you may know, it doesn't look like there will be a Velogames Fantasy Tour De France this year. Here's the statement from George:



Now if you really want to do a Fantasy Tour De France, you can always go and play the ASO's Fantasy Tour De France. But bear in mind that the word on the street is that it was the ASO who got legal with George to shut down the competition, so I say Fuck Them. If you want to keep supporting Velogames, you can always pick a team for the Giro Rosa, but make it quick, entries close at 16:00 EST.

At the moment I'm not sure what to do about the Fantasy Tour, other non-ASO fantasy games are available, (pending more ASO bullshit) and I liked that Velogames was low maintenance, with no transfers or Team Captains to worry about. For the record, here's my team, which would surely have beaten all you losers. Feel free to post your Velogames team in the comments to give me a sorely needed chuckle.

All Rounder Richie Porte BMC Racing Team 22
All Rounder Geraint Thomas Team Sky 14
Climber Adam Yates Mitchelton-Scott 14
Climber Ilnur Zakarin Team Katusha - Alpecin 10
Sprinter Fernando Gaviria Quick-Step Floors 16
Unclassed David Gaudu Groupama - FDJ 6
Unclassed Omar Fraile Astana Pro Team 6
Unclassed Michael Gogl Trek - Segafredo 4
Sprinter Sonny Colbrelli Bahrain Merida Pro Cycling Team 8
100

Tuesday, July 3, 2018

Fantasy Tour De France 2018 Open For Chancers

Hello Pance Pickers! I hope you’re as excited as me for the 2018 Fantasy Tour de France! The clock is ticking for you to make your team selections at Velogames and then sign up to the trusty Tour de Pance league with the code - 09499413 - and then take on the might/shite of the Bile Beans.


Team selection this year is giving me even more sleepless nights than usual. There’s certainly some quality riders who will be lining up at the start on Saturday. It looked for a while like Chris Froome might not be racing, but now his inconvenient Adverse Analytical Finding has been swept under the carpet resolved with the support of sound analytical data and statistical analysis, he’ll be looking to take his fifth win – he’ll cost you 26 credits though.



3-times-in-a-row World Champion and King of the Wheelie, Peter Sagan will surely be up there in the Green Jersey competition, (if he doesn’t get DQ’ed again, or crash, or get sick) – but he’ll cost you 20 of your precious credits.



Not to mention some climber, who will probably have a crack at taking the Polka Dot Jersey as no one else seems very interested in it – prices for climbers vary from a Costly Quintana at 18 credits to a more Frugal Frank for 8 credits.


And of course, don’t forget to pick some talented domestiques to back-up your big names.



So, use your points wisely and try not to spend them on someone who will leave the race in an ambulance before the end of Stage 1. If it all seems a bit much, you can always brush up on the race with the handy guide produced by that paragon of journalism, the Daily Mirror. Unfortunately it’s been updated since it was first posted, but here’s some of the insights they gave for the 2018 race.






Tuesday, June 19, 2018

Time's up for Suisse Watchers

Hello, the Tour De Suisse wrapped up the other day, but I only just noticed. Overall victory went to little Richie Porte, who might just be a Dark Horse for the Tour, but not far behind was another Tour hopeful, Nairo Quintana. 




The Bile Beans started off strong, but fell apart in the mountains. So heading up the Fantasy Fun were Enrico 666, who also seem to be heading up the overall season competition too. 


Next up, a little race called the Tour De France. Perhaps I will see you there?

Monday, June 11, 2018

Dauphine Round-Up/ Swiss Roll-up

The Bile Beans performance at the Dauphine can be summed up pretty simply -SAD!
Like many a rider though, I was just using the race to hone my performance ahead of the Tour De France. So surviving some last-minute puncture drama, the original G'ster, Geraint Thomas, won himself the Criterium du Dauphine.


Things went pretty smoothly for Mungo, but as they us say, the Dauphine winner never wins the Tour, (except when he does).


Over in Switzerland, the Tour de Suisse rolls along. We've had three stages so far and thanks to some sprinting luck, the Bile Beans are not languishing in last position. Lets have a quick look at the scores, while I can still take some pride in them.